Please Don’t Annoy Dying Darwin

Author: Enezio E. de Almeida Filho
Subject: Apologetics
Date:  09/11/2006

“Please don’t annoy dying Darwin with contrary and devastating evidences news against his theory!”


Darwin has been ill seriously for more than a century in an intensive care unit [ICU] at NFGH – Naturalist Philosophical Grand Hospital in London. Since Darwin demands serious medical treatment, the hospital spokesman read his health report, and issued the following note to the International Grand Media [IGM]:

Despite the New Synthesis treatment that was given Darwin in the 20th Century in an ad hoc attempt to recover him, the epistemological health of our revered patient Darwin demands extreme care. Please don’t annoy dying Darwin with these contrary and devastating evidences news against his general theory of evolution! It is definitely forbidden to comment publicly about the following issues (especially in public schools):

  1. Specified Complex Information.
  2. Digital Code along the DNA [if the eye caused Darwin to shiver, sirs, this may kill him from epistemological apoplexy].
  3. A fossil record that shows abrupt appearance of all major phyla [this is no obtuse creationists make up nor from the wicked Intelligent Design gang, but from a more than perfect “fossil record”].
  4. Irreducibly complexity molecular machinery [Neither Darwin nor his peers knew what today high school students really know about the cell].
  5. A natural mechanism that has no creative power [it is a conservative mechanism – the more apt survives, always!].
  6. How can the common ancestor hypothesis be falsified?
  7. Evolution is a FACT, but we don’t know exactly what the mechanism was [or mechanisms were – if it wasn’t ‘x’ then ‘y’, if it wasn’t ‘y’ then ‘z’, if it wasn’t ‘z’ then the ABC is over]…
  8. Evolutionary biology depends on an especially crafted epistemology for itself: historical reconstructions of events that cannot be repeated and that need to be accepted by faith (oops, they are a priori axioms, for the evolutionists are talking ever more like creationists…).
  9. Intelligent Design (argh, this kills Darwin for good…).

Meanwhile in the market of ideas, Dawkins, Dennett, and other Darwin’s nimble advertising boys almost orphans announce to the International Grand Media: “Please accept our “epistemological promissory notes”, our “Natura non Facit Saltum credit cards”, and keep trusting Darwin, for he has long term credit and a co-signer’s agreement from the IMF [Imaginary Macroevolutionary Fund]…”

Dr. Episteme Kuhn Popper Feyerabend did another reading of the last generation epistemological equipments that keep dying Darwin in the ICU, looks tenderly to the now almost widow Scientific Nomenklatura, and he sees no scientific resources to keep him alive…

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